Jane Lately #43

Amy does this thing in her newsletter called “Useletter” when she links to previous ones: parenthesizes the # of the list item to which she is referring. I quite like this, so I’ll be adopting it; I surmise it’s easier and quicker than creating #links every time I want to refer to a particular part of a Jane Lately, even if there’s already an anchor link in place, since I won’t even have to look if I can’t remember that link.

1. Full bed bliss

While visiting Mimi, I slept in a full bed rather than the queen I slept in during previous visits. I’d been looking at beds, mainly out of curiosity, and one of the beds I liked most was available in a full bed size, plus costs less than a queen. 😅 My only dilemma was that I wasn’t sure whether I’d fit a full, considering I’m only five inches shorter than the size of a full bed, so this sleeping arrangement worked in my favor!

At present, I plan to move in with Char, her husband, and their kids when they rent a house, so I can help out with the kids (and also not be homeless). I’ve been looking at various ways to set up a bed in a room so it conserves space and allows for small living areas for the past six months, and the size of a queen bed was simply not working out for me in anything I was finding. 🤷 I wanted a multi-functional bed with storage capabilities to maximize potential, especially since I’m not into having shit under the bed. It’s not pretty. The one I’m in love with allows the mattress to be lifted like the hood of a car so you can place whatever underneath. I figure it’d be brilliant for storing bed accessories not in use and seasonal clothes if needed.

That said, it’s a ways off and who knows when? I’m not in a rush, but I figured it’s never too early to look at things like that! I’m also not talking much about living arrangement happenings yet because 🤣 I can only imagine the backlash that will come about, starting with how Charlise will probably be a bad influence on me (because apparently that’s possible). 🤔

2. I know like twenty different ways to eat yogurt.

My diet is half liquid, half solids. By “diet”, I mean food intake—not diet in terms of, “Oh, you’re on a diet?” 🙄 This is the only way I’ve been able to eat more. Every time I try to up my solids intake, I gag my food down. It’s really disgusting. Then, I nearly vomit trying to keep it down. The workaround = half and half. 🤷 It’s just what’s working for me.

I consider yogurt and ice cream to be liquids, and obviously I’ve gotta be creative because eating yogurt plain all the time gets old fast. My favorite take on it lately is yogurt topped with pumpkin spice Cheerios. It probably sounds gross when you find out I’m using strawberry banana Yoplait for this, but it’s actually super tasty! I’m so smitten. 😅👌 It’s also an easy, painless way to get dairy in, because rice milk does not qualify for dairy and I can’t do dairy milk unless I want to reside on the toilet for ten hours because I’m lactose intolerant.

One thing to note, because it’s a mold to which I’m allergic: this is one of those lesser-of-two-evils situations, which I’ve frequented in my allergy journey. Most yogurt contains two cultures necessary for a proper stomach environment so you can digest food without much issue, which cannot easily be consumed for me in another way. Most yogurt works for me in this case. A lot of brands make me sick. I stick to Oikos with honey, which I’ve not seen on shelves for the past few years 😭😒, and Yoplait or a generic brand of it. I have tried Chobani, but I can’t—it tastes like vomit. 🤢

A similar allergen to this situation is raw honey, from local and ethical bee farms, because it helps with pollen allergies.

If I ever do have issues with the mold allergens, I make sure to consume ginger or garlic in some way—usually ginger ale or ginger chews—because those two things cancel out molds. It’s like a life hack. 🤔😂 I get the necessary nutrients from the molds, without the mold reaction, and I feel like I’m winning. 👌 If I come across the studies supporting this, I’ll link them; otherwise, I don’t remember them. 🤦

3. Self-care actually pays off?? + investing in yourself

I used to roll my eyes at the idea of self-care, for myself, because I was pressured by the world around me to think it overrated and ridiculous, conditioned to believe putting myself last is best and busyness should be celebrated. However, it’s through practicing self-care in the last wuarter that I have realize how important it is to stop and just…treat yourself, or enjoy life. It’s good to reflect, I knew, but it’s better to take a few moments for yourself instead of stretching yourself thin.

Weekly, I tend to my nails—grooming, painting. I didn’t expect to, but I look forward to getting to redo them each week. Even though I’m single, I keep them short; it’s a personal preference. I’m not into long nails. 🤷 I’m getting better at painting them, including with my less dominant hand, and it’s exciting! It makes me so happy. 😊

I cut my leg on one of the two boxes, full of kitchen miscellany because there was no space for it, in the kitchen walkway and did the whole first aid shebang, and it seems to be healing quicker than if I’d just left it like I used to. I’m keeping a bandage over it because it’s a gentle reminder when I instinctively go to itch it (because scabs are itchy).

Showers used to be a quick in-and-out for me, but I’ve been enjoying them as of late. I take my time instead of rushing. I find solace standing under the water. It works almost like a reset.

I’m still playing around with self-expression. I consider my Ipsy subscription a way to invest in myself; I like where this is all going for me.

4. Non-denominational Christian vs. Church of Christ

I was raised with the belief that I am a non-denominational Christian. To this day, I feel this holds true and needs no proofing. My paternal family is Assembly of God, while my maternal family is Church of Christ.

Assembly of God and myself is…eh, I find they’re too obsessed with discussing the devil for me? It’s like, go to church to praise the holy trinity, but wait—let’s spend an hour discussing the evil in this world instead of nourishing our souls. 🤷

Church of Christ, I just can’t get behind. During sermons, it seems the preachers skip verses to that rebuke their lesson, akin to telling a story and leaving out the parts that remove your persuasion because they force you to remain unbiased, make you look less like a hero, and/or show the holes in your point. And I can’t keep up. There I’m sitting, in the pew with my Bible, and the man is speaking across several verses and blatantly ignoring parts of the Bible that are opposite the religion’s principles. 🤦

I seldom get religious on my blog, not because it’s controversial but because I loathe religion, don’t currently attend church, and prefer not to proselytize. I also believe love and kindness gets me farther than attempting to convert someone, especially since this is what worked for me, and too often I hear stories about people who despise Christians who have a supremacist agenda because they believe they’ve the right of way. I’m patient in this department. I’m also not fond of the idea that you’ll go to hell if you’re not part of Church of Christ, nor the idea that you need to use coercion and manipulation to make believers as per Assembly of God teachings.

So, despite my seldom religious ramblings, I felt this necessary to include in this edition of Jane Lately because I won’t include it in its own post, and I’ve been thinking about this topic a lot in the past month. It’s just frustrating to me, because I don’t belong to a specific denomination. Church of Christ is supposedly non-denominational, but it’s such a logical fallacy because a denomination of Christianity cannot be non-denominational. 🤔🤷 And I have to enter into related situations with the kind of mindset that can combat against ish like this.

5. [Soft] boudoir

Last year, I developed an admiration for non-erotic boudoir, or intimate photography. Bodies are beautiful and vary among individuals. Society sexualizes the female body, but is desensitized to the male body thanks to Hollywood’s obsession with shirtless dudes and teen magazines including “hot guy” posters. Men are still sensitive even to a woman breastfeeding her child.

Obviously content won’t be pornographic—against my host’s terms—but I will be posting more intimate selfies. This is me prefacing you in the event you wish to jump ship. 🤷

I don’t find any issue with such photography. It’s no different from swimsuits, and I don’t understand why my body, in its raw and natural state, is considered provocative. Or wrong.

Bare leg and foot on bed, warm glow created by ceiling light; textured pattern curtain in background; black and white
While it’s grainy, I feel it adds to that rawness? Maybe?

This is me throwing the finger to the stigma. 🖕

As long as I feel comfortable with it. 😅

6. I’ve been thinking about how I could expand my blog.

Being nicheless creates a disadvantage in the grow-your-blog department, because you lack the traction a niche-oriented blog collects. If you asked me previously, I’d have said comments are best, but I struggle with comments and have matured to a point that I can empathize with people who don’t leave many comments in regard to why they might suck at comments akin to myself. 💁

The best way for me, I think, will be through helpful blog posts. I consider creating a blog theme ever so often, but unless I feel utterly passionate about it, I don’t see it happening. 😅 I get burnt out if I spend too much time coding, and I get frustrated because my dissociative identity disorder complicates my ability to process code for long durations of time. Plus, I loathe keeping up with shit I’m just not passionate about. 🤷

I have thought a bit about my future in regard to blogging, in that I’d love to do presentations and travel, as much as it freaks me out. I’m both excited and frightened by this person I’m becoming, because I shock myself silly when I do something outside the character I perceived for myself and enjoy it so much that I decide to adopt it into my new character; I guess it’s what Rebecca Mikaelson would call “character building”.

I’m going to be saying yes a lot more than I used to. 😅

Janepedia has had lots of reconstruction behind the scenes, too. I created a “Best” page, because I loathe the “start here” pages most of the time and didn’t think it appropriate, but wanted to give people a starting place since personal blogs can be overwhelming; I removed the “Evolution” page and updated old theme announcement posts to contain their corresponding theme screenshots, captioning those images with the name of the designer and how long they were on the blog for (example); I’m also using shorter slugs for post permalinks ’cause it’s easier to remember and looks cleaner. 🤷 What I’ve been doing before wasn’t working, and I’ve finally had the time and patience required to figure out how I can make it work for me and not be a hassle.

That’s me lately! I’ll post my annual review and greet the new year in the next two posts. I’ve been away visiting with Mimi on her farm, so I didn’t have a chance to prepare blog posts like I expected to. I wrote this in Google Docs, via the app on my phone; I never realized it could be useful to me until I pulled it up out of curiosity. So convenient!

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I don’t know much about the Church of Christ. I also belong to a non-denominational church, but it doesn’t have a label at all. There are things about the church that I agree with and some I don’t, but I still feel like the overall experience of going brings me closer to God. You definitely need to do what’s best for you as far as your spiritual life goes.

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Truth. I don’t currently attend church because I don’t feel that I fit into any of the ones in my vicinity—and that’s before sexuality or gender issues were even addressed in the church. I think it’s because I’m in the Bible Belt, since people outside it tell me their churches are almost the complete opposite of my options here.

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