F*ck adulting.

“Adulting” is a word created by Millennials, probably, because preceding generations a) failed to teach us properly and b) succeeded in fucking the world up and leaving it to the Millennials to save, which means Millennials can’t adult. Or it’s a meme. Either way, I like it, as a disabled person, because?? It’s totally relevant. I can name so many adulting things I never learned how to do, yet out of everything I learned to do in school, I can only remember basic maths and how to say a few words in Spanish—little of which is actually useful in the real world.

This post isn’t about any of that, rather it’s about being a 28-year-old woman who appears obviously autistic when she walks down an aisle in Sprouts to find an entire row of nut-free foods and her mind can only express itself by jumping up and down, and flapping her hands—only to be perceived as a child or an adult whose brain is “not fully developed”, while other people her age may spend their Friday nights at clubs and Saturday mornings with hangovers are considered “actual adults”. Somehow, there is a stigma there dividing the two types of adults, accepting only a third type of adult who is the “ideal” American woman, probably dreaming of that white picket fence in a cookie cutter neighborhood living off the Santa Clarita diet.

Knock if you have donuts

This post is a fuck that to that stigma shit, because what the fuck? Why do I get all the stares? Why is it socially acceptable to pick at other adults’ flaws that are actually harmless? Why does being an adult mean never having an immature thought? WHY DO WE HAVE TO BE SO PROPER instead of admitting “double balls” on a vegan frozen dinner is hilarious?

(Side note: Why is it OK to have double-balls vegan frozen dinners in grocery stores, wherein children of reading age can read them and then repeat those words to other people—or ON FOOD AT ALL—but homosexuality is still illustrated by Fox News as the beast disrupting American citizens everywhere?)

Everyone is shit at some part of adulting. First of all, what even IS adulting?! Able-bodied people love to pick at disabled people for what they can’t do, but there’s this thing thrown right back at able-bodied people that I like:

Able-bodied people cannot grow/harvest everything they want to eat, so they need grocery stores. In this way, they are disabled the same way someone whose disabilities prevents them from driving legally cannot drive.

Everyone has something they’re unable to do, but for some reason history has categorized people of “lesser” abilities than what is socially expected of them to be acceptable citizens in this world into a separate category of humans that is seen, and accepted, as the inferior species.

And all of it is 100 percent bullshit.

Part of F*ck It! Fridays, a series wherein I call BS on things.

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If it makes you feel any better, from what I’m seeing with the next generation, they’re going to be so far from adulting that there will be zero room from which to judge anyone.

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