Although more people are aware of autism, most people don’t know what autism means or even is. You might hear about autistic people in movies, on social media, or in casual conversations — but what does being autistic actually mean?
Autism, or Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), is a neurodevelopmental difference that affects how a person
- thinks
- communicates
- experiences and interacts with the world.
Autism is called a spectrum because it looks different for everyone. And before you picture it in your mind, autistic people are referring to this kind of spectrum — not a line:
The support autistic people need in their daily lives varies. Some autistics may need significant support, while others may not need any support at all. The amount of support an autistic person needs isn’t a measurement of how autistic they are.
How autistic people experience the world
Being autistic doesn’t mean broken or less than. It means having a brain that functions differently. This can affect how someone
- Communicates: Some autistic people are hyperverbal, others prefer not to speak, and many autistics communicate best beyond spoken language (e.g. writing, sign language, gestures, assistive technology).
- Interacts with interests and routines: Many autistic people find comfort and joy in deep, focused interests or routines. These aren’t simply “hobbies” — they’re often a source of stability and happiness.
- Processes sensory input: Bright lights, loud noises, certain fabrics and/or strong smells can be overwhelming. On the other hand, some autistics may seek out sensory input other autistics find intense (sensory-seeking).
- Understands social dynamics: Social interactions might feel like trying to solve an invisible puzzle. Autistic people may need clear, direct communication instead of vague hints or unspoken expectations.
Autism is a lifelong identity
No one “grows out of” autism. Allistic researchers who don’t listen to autistic people like sharing their insights about this concept, claiming ABA helps.
However, that’s ignorant of the autistic life experience. What’s actually happening when a child who once seemed “really autistic” stops seeming “so autistic” is masking. Or it’s an autistic person having the supports they need.
Non-autistic people don’t understand the fluid identity of autism as well, so it’s understandable that they would experience ableism in this way.
Autism isn’t caused by vaccines, bad parenting or poor diets. You’re born autistic and remain autistic for life.
Some people discover they’re autistic as kids, while others don’t find out until adulthood when they’re struggling.
Regardless of when someone is diagnosed, they’re still autistic. Learning about your autistic identity can be freeing and validating — it can also be even more confusing.
Common myths about autism
Unfortunately, there’s still a lot of misinformation about autism. Let’s clear up a few myths.
Myth: Autistic people lack empathy.
Truth: Empathy is taught, not something you’re born with.
Many autistics feel emotions deeply, but don’t always know what they’re feeling or how because of alexithymia.
An autistic person might express autism differently or struggle to know what to do with unspoken signals of distress. We’re not oblivious to allistic communication norms — our brains don’t know how to process that information.
Related: Double empathy problem
Myth: Autism only affects boys.
Truth: Autism affects people of all genders.
Girls, women and nonbinary people often go undiagnosed because their traits may be less obvious or misunderstood.
Patriarchy society teaches people assigned female at birth (AFAB) to be quieter, compliant and demure. Those who don’t comply are considered “difficult” or “troubled”.
Myth: All autistic people have savant skills.
Truth: Some autistics have extraordinary skills in specific areas, but this doesn’t make them “more” autistic.
The autistic savant trope is harmful to the autistic community and not supportive language. Non-autistic prodigies exist and are nurtured through school or their families because of the resources available.
Autistic prodigies’ behaviors are pathologized because they’re autistic, and non-autistic people perceive this as “inspiring”. Actually, this is inspiration porn. Autistic people don’t exist for your inspiration.
Being a savant at something may also be a coping strategy or a component of masking.
I was great at algebra. I wanted to major in maths, actually. Then post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) kicked in, and my memory started going kaput. The less I could mask, the less I could solve maths problems.
Why understanding autism matters
When people understand autism, they can better accept and accommodate autistic individuals. This might mean
- Avoiding judgment when someone needs to step away from an overwhelming situation
- Being patient when someone communicates differently
- Recognizing that stimming (e.g. hand-flapping, rocking, fidgeting) is a helpful coping mechanism — not something to be discouraged
- Viewing less “positive” autistic traits as unique differences, rather than burdens, inconveniences or problems to be solved
Autistic people don’t need to be “fixed” — they need to be supported and accepted for who they are.
What being autistic means to me
Being autistic means I experience the world differently and most people I meet or know won’t understand no matter how much I try to explain it to them.
While I used to try to stifle my differences so I could connect with people, I’m now embracing my differences and honoring my limits.
Meeting people who don’t see my differences as problems I need to solve has taught me that my needs aren’t the problem. Not everyone has the capacity for having an autistic friend or person in their life, and that’s okay.
It sucks, yet I can’t change the unchangeable things about me to turn into someone that makes other people more comfortable with my existence.
I live differently. Learning you’re autistic involves a grieving process where you must come to terms with the fact that your life isn’t going to look like the “typical” life non-autistic people live.
Being autistic means I need to be held to my own standard — not the same standard allistics my age are held to.
Being autistic means the nuance that is being autistic matters far more than whether others perceive me as autistic.
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